Which is worse

I don't know which is worse,

The fact that you are a memory now

Or the fact you still haunt me

The fact that you are a nightmare now

Or the fact that I still long for you

I don't know which is worse

Jotting my feelings down

Or pushing them in the left corner of my left heart 

Let the tears roll down my cheek

Or just smile through 

Wish I knew which is worse!

Yours
Thinking out loud