There she was sitting in the darkness, staring at nothing. She has been doing this very same thing for months together now and somehow staring at nothing but you somehow calms her ever fluctuating mind. But its not you she stares at, she stares at her own thoughts.....
Thinking and rethinking and revisiting and re-revisiting them again and again.... There is always that sharp pang that stops her beating heart....But then has it not stopped already?
What went wrong?
Or What is wrong?
Was it even there?
Is it even there?
Whatever you said, did you sincerely mean any of them?
But the knowing you and observing your take on life, yeah some point of time even i believe some part of it was true...
Whatever i feel, does it even exist?
Am i so fragile?
Am i so weak, that you can break me up again?
Why then, why later and why now, why is it i fail to learn from my mistakes?
Or is that i will never learn form my mistakes?
Or is it that i will continue to fall?
She doesn't know whether to ask for forgiveness
She doesn't know whether to run away
She doesn't know whether to abandon you
She doesn't know whether to please you
But she has done something wrong already!
Because whatever she does or doesn't kills her anyway
And that is why she has killed you and murdered her own soul.....
Leaving that "us" to drown deep, deep into emptiness
But then isn't that you what you have always wanted?
To be free from any form of attachment?
Sometimes i just wonder!
What are you looking for?
One moment you walk with me
The very next moment you are that stranger walking down all alone on a lonely dark night
One moment you are mine
The very next moment you are someone i used to know
One moment you are afraid of loosing her
The very next moment you don't care
Are you this tough or you are good at pretending?
But when i think of those painful years you have been through, it all makes sense. All the broken pieces seems to stick to the right places.
And then i have only one question, why me?
But she isn't any saint!
Ask forgiveness for what, loving you?
Isn't that unconditional?
Isn't that consuming?
That one thought, that one day, that one night and that one question. What she has to loose anyway, what i have to loose anyway. That killed her. That killed me from within.
Yours
Soulless and spiritless monster, who killed her own soul!
Thinking and rethinking and revisiting and re-revisiting them again and again.... There is always that sharp pang that stops her beating heart....But then has it not stopped already?
What went wrong?
Or What is wrong?
Was it even there?
Is it even there?
Whatever you said, did you sincerely mean any of them?
But the knowing you and observing your take on life, yeah some point of time even i believe some part of it was true...
Whatever i feel, does it even exist?
Am i so fragile?
Am i so weak, that you can break me up again?
Why then, why later and why now, why is it i fail to learn from my mistakes?
Or is that i will never learn form my mistakes?
Or is it that i will continue to fall?
She doesn't know whether to ask for forgiveness
She doesn't know whether to run away
She doesn't know whether to abandon you
She doesn't know whether to please you
But she has done something wrong already!
Because whatever she does or doesn't kills her anyway
And that is why she has killed you and murdered her own soul.....
Leaving that "us" to drown deep, deep into emptiness
But then isn't that you what you have always wanted?
To be free from any form of attachment?
Sometimes i just wonder!
What are you looking for?
One moment you walk with me
The very next moment you are that stranger walking down all alone on a lonely dark night
One moment you are mine
The very next moment you are someone i used to know
One moment you are afraid of loosing her
The very next moment you don't care
Are you this tough or you are good at pretending?
But when i think of those painful years you have been through, it all makes sense. All the broken pieces seems to stick to the right places.
And then i have only one question, why me?
But she isn't any saint!
Ask forgiveness for what, loving you?
Isn't that unconditional?
Isn't that consuming?
That one thought, that one day, that one night and that one question. What she has to loose anyway, what i have to loose anyway. That killed her. That killed me from within.
Yours
Soulless and spiritless monster, who killed her own soul!
2 comments:
Well wondering and wandering is the inherent tendency of an unrestrained soul,and every un-enlightened human being has a proclivity towards unsrestraintment.The thoughts, the horrifying moments that disturb us, petrify our normal sense of understanding and our regular life, are denoument of this abysmal tendency. The mind is faster than light.The solution lies in keeping it stable. But the question still remains: Does anybody wants the solution?!!
Well u almost thought u lost ur blogstalker, dint u?:P. Noone loses me, all they lose is the me inside.Anyway here I am back with my so very anticipated comments :P.cheerio!!:D
Dear blogstalker, glad to have you back :D
I hope you don't loose the you inside. No one loses you :) You just reminded me of someone dear to me :)
And talking about stability, it is too hard to be stable. It is too hard to stay focused and sane. And finding the solution is not difficult but sticking to it. You are absolutely right. Thoughts travel faster than the light. But what stuns me is, what i am supposed to do. I can't stop them. I can't let them abandon me! but somehow they have killed that inner one. :)
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